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Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Love Lessons

Love Lessons by Jacqueline Wilson
Jacqueline Wilson is one of my favourite authors, ever. Her books are fabbity-fab. (Sorry, she's just so cool she requires some made-up word!) But this one is quite unlike the others. I adore this book, it has millions of twists and turns, and, unlike most romances I read (ocassionaly. VERY ocasionally) I wasn't laughing all the time, because this was more then just a romance. This book is about Prudence who's 14 who has been homeschooled since she was small by her paranoid over-controlling dad. When Prudence and her sister, Grace have to go to school, it's quite a shock. For one thing, Prue was always considered the brain of the family, but soon finds that she doesn't really know anything except how to paint. So, two times a week she finds refuge in Mr Raxberry's art class, and soon finds herself baby-sitting for him. This turns out to be a mistake, because they soon get really close...

The Ruby in the Smoke

The Ruby in the Smoke by Philip Pullman
Everybody seems to love Philip Pullmans novels. Except me. I adored Northern Lights, but The Subtle Knife was a bit wearisome while The Amber Spyglass was downright silly. But, because I didn't have anything else to read, I tried Mr Pullman again.
Now there's a mistake I won't make again.
The Ruby in the Smoke is pretty ludicrous---drugs, rewards, gangs, and oh yeah, it's set in the 19th century. You know, if these books were published as adults' books, they'd be dismissed as trash and would be right beside the Mills & Boons. But, because they're kids books and by a guy who wrote one good book, they're declared great. Why?
This books seems like some silly thriller that you'd buy for 2.50 while buying some milk. I mean, come on, there's opium, there's smuggling, there's betrayal, there is many other things that make this pulp fiction.
And, for some reason, Mr Pullman gets away with writing it, for some reason gets away with declaring it as some sort of YA adventure story, reviewers are too afraid to say it's bad, because this is, after all, Philip Pullman.
So it should be good, right?
Wrong. Philip Pullman, if you're reading, withdraw your stupid Sally Lockhart books as supposed YA books and start selling them beside the milk where they belong.

Cats For Dummies

Cats For Dummies
As a self-confessed cat servant, I'm always looking for books on cats. So, when I find Cats for Dummies at the library, I immediately checked it out. Unlike most books for cat owners slaves, you could tell the authors actually had cats. I've had my cat for...a long time, so I quickly bypassed the getting a cat chapters, and moved onto the other stuff. It covers getting a cat, the kitty litter (I'm so glad our cat is an indoor/outdoor one and doesn't need a litterbox), cat toys (FREE ONES!), and cat behaviour. Unfortunately, the chapter on giving your cat medicene was no use...*sigh* The part of tens, with ten cat quotes (there were definitely more then 10!) was especially funny. Especially this one:
"Dogs have owners, cats have staff."
So, so true.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

The V Club

The V Club by Kate Brian
This may be one of the worst books I've ever read. It's got a really bad writing style, no plot whatsoever, is full of fluff, and is just downright stupid. In other words, I hate it.
So, when details of a mysterious new scholarship arise, everyone's interested. But, there's a condition: the winner must be of absolute purity of mind and sprit.
Which everyone takes to mean no hanky-panky.
So, will the new girl, the biggest slut in school, the girl who's never been kissed, the rich girl and the other girls prove themselves to be "pure"?
They're not sure. So, they set up "The Virgin Club". (It reminds me of that movie, what's it called? The Virgin Suicides? I've never seen it, but it sounds like the same title. Whatever.)
Is this book supposed to be contraversial? A light read? About love? Isn't doing any of the above. It's too full of stupid details (like: "Debbie took out a silver tube of Clinque lipgloss, applying a immaculate shade of Black Honey." Who CARES?!) to be contraversial. To boring to be a light read. And espite the authors efforts, this isn't some sort of bizarre romance. My advice? Don't read it.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Harry Potter & The Half Blood Prince

I've read this book about ten times, and I'm still not tired of it. It's so good that the first time I read it, it took only a day! So, just in case you're one of the, oh, 5 people who haven't read it, I won't put up any spoilers.
So, now Harry's 16, and he's studying for his N.E.W.T.s. Well, when he's not battling evil and playing quidditch that is. Of course, Voldemort is on. The. Loose. (AARRGGHH!!) So everyone is in extreme panic. We discover Snape has serious issues, and gasp at the many twists and turns.

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Many Stones

Many Stones by Caroline Noman
Ugh. This book is so worthy. I really hate worthy books. I mean, in the space of seven days she forgives everyone who’s done something bad to her. Puh-lease! I still haven’t forgiven that girl who stole my cherry when I was two, and I’m supposed to believe this girl forgives all the wrongs of the world? Sure.
So, Berry is this total freak who’s sister dies, and she puts stones on top of her to stop her "floating away". Right. As I said, she’s a freak. A total and utter freak. So, then she goes to a memorial service for her sister with her dad. (One of those people she forgives.) The service is in South Africa, and she meets all sorts of people. Whom she thinks what the author thinks are "profound thoughts". In fact, it’s just really boring. If you want to be bored to death, this is the book for you!!

Thursday, August 17, 2006

The Mediator 6

The Mediator 6 by Meg Cabot.
The road to a good relationship is filled with potholes, right? Unfortunately, one of them is that Suzes' boyfriend, Jesse, just happens to be a ghost.
In the latest (and last) installment of The Mediator, Suze has to battle with evil guy Paul, high school, her annoying brother Brad, and of course, Paul threatening not to let Jesse die at all...
This book is great. I though that the 5th one was worse then the others, but this one is, by far, the best. There's weird ghostly adventures, and maybe, just maybe, a happy ending...
But seriously, you will so not believe the twist it takes at the end.
Actually, you won't see any of the twists and turns coming.

Bad Kitty

Bad Kitty by Michele Jaffe
OK, I love this book. There's lipgloss and mysteries and fashion and cute boys. What's not to like? I read it earlier today and now I'm reading it again. That is how good it is. So, Jas goes on holidays to Las Vegas with her overprotective dad, Sherri!, her stepmother and her trusted cowboy boots. But, wouldn't you know it, Jasmine gets in trouble.
Again.
Somehow she manages to get embroiled in a mystery, and from there it's a blur of lipgloss, deadly cowboy boots, pink vans and Evil Hench People. Go read it, as in now, it's totally Visa.
(You'll get it when you read it.)

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Wuthering Heights

Sorry! I meant to post yesterday, but Blogger gave me problems.

OK, I admit it, I forgot my username. Let this be a warning to anyone who decides to have 6 blogs, you forget your usernames. *sigh* Anyway, onto Cathy and Heathcliff...

Wuthering Heights, by Emily Bronte
Just like in Frankenstein there was no mad scientist, and how in Pride & Predudice Lizzy Bennet really annoyed me instead of being a fab character, in Wuthering Heights there was no Cathy prowling the moors as a ghost crying "Heeeeeeeeeeeeathcliff." I had always been led to believe this was so. That's not to say it's good, the Bronte family is very talented. This book only comes second to Jane Eyre. The story is so complex and twisting, that I won't even try to descripe it. Basically, this is a fantastic book. It's narrated by the housekeeper (I've wanted a housekeeper all my life, but seeing how much information they retain, I'm having second thoughts), and is just...great. My mom told me that she cried at the end of this book. I did not feel remotely like crying, I actually thought it was a really happy ending...even though everyone dies. God, I'm so morbid. I should stop reading vampire novels. Anyway, I'd say everyone should read this book. I know a lot of people have trouble reading classics, and I always find the first chapter a bit hard, but once you get into the swing of things, these books are great. So go read it, even though there were no ghosts.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Wuthering Heights

I'm halfway through Wuthering Heights,I've been reading it all day. I'll probably be finished by tomorrow, and I promise I'll post a review!

I Capture the Castle

I Capture the Castle, by Dodie Smith
OK, all the other books I've reviewed are ones I've ones I've just read (yes, before you ask, I am a speed reader. I had this one teacher, when I was 7, and we were only supposed to one one page of our reading books each night, but I actually read the whole thing. Each night. She hated me for that, because eventually I didn't have any reading books, because I'd read them all. Happy times.), but I'm making an exception in this case. I Capture the Castle is #1 on my favourite book list (not to be confused with my favourite author list. Must post that some time.), so I had to review it. This is one wacky family. There's her father, who is supposdly a writer...he just hasn't written a book for about 7 years. Then there's Rose, Cassandra's sister who's 21 and will do anything for money. There's Thomas, who doesn't really matter because he hasn't anything to do with the plot. There's Steven, who used to be the Mortmains servant, but because they're broke, they can't pay him. But, because he's in love with Cassandra he stays and works...for no pay. (NB: working for no pay is a baaaaad idea) And then two American strangers turn up, and everything goes topsy-turvy. Extreme style.
Someone made a low-budget movie of this, which I keep on meaning to track down. But now there's supposdly some big-budget version of it coming which SUCKS. I saw the movie edition of the book, and CASSANDRA DOESN'T LOOK LIKE CASSANDRA. None of them look like the characters they're supposed to be. Cassandra, you are not supposed to look capricous, OK? Also, did they even have tank tops in the 1930s? No? THEN WHY IS CASSANDRA WEARING A TANK TOP?! Also, the book looked too short, which makes me think they wrote a movie edition of it, just like they did with the Narnia books. (Yep. They wrote movie editions. Of Narnia. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM?!) Anyway, sorry, this turned into a rant, didn't it? The upshot of it is, go read the book. It's fab.

Daughter of Venice

Daughter of Venice by Donna Jo Napoli
I hope I got the authors' name right. Anyway, Donata is 14 and lives in Venice in 1592. She and her twin sister want to get married, so they don't have to live in a convent. (Seriously. If they don't get married, they go to a convent. Or else they become hookers. Hmm, tough choice.) But she wants to see Venice, because she's not allowed out of the house. (Go with it. This is 1592, can't have the young ladies spoilt by pollution. Oh, wait, there was no pollution.) So she gets the bright idea of dressing up as a boy, and going out into Venice. And, oh joy, she gets to get tutored like her brothers. So, anyway, it has all of her...adventures. If you could call them that. I had to stop halfway through the book and read the books I reviewed below, because it was sooo boring. Then I finished it, to find out if she does anything cool. Well, I suppose she'd call what happens cool. I call it an wholly unbelievable and unsatisfactory ending.

The Baby-sitters Club

The Babysitters Club #94: Stacy McGilly, Super Sitter by Ann M. Martin
Whoa, that's one long title. Yes, I read the Babysitters club books. You can stop laughing now. Anyway, I don't like Ann M. Martin so much now, because whenever I like a book, I write a long lengthy letter to the author. I usually get a long lengthy letter back. But not from Ms. Martin! No, it has on her website "Send me a letter", and so I send her letter and get a form letter back, which really annoys me. She didn't even answer my questions, and now I'm bitter and twisted about the whole thing.
Anyway.
So, in this book, Stacy wants to surprise her boyfriend, Robert (OK, how come all those babysitters get such good boyfriends?! Even the 11 year olds have them! Not fair! Like, all the boys I know are jerks, but in babysitter world there are niced boys. Grr.), by taking him to a Broadway show. (Yeah, and in a month. I don't get it. She gets enough money for Broadway by a month of babysitting. I'm pretty sure you can't even get a cinema ticket from a month of babysitting, and she gets Broadway tickets?! God, I want to live in babysitter world.) So, anyway, she takes this job with a neurotic woman, who works her really hard, by getting her to do all this housework as well as babysit. Quit, Stacy, quit! You have enough money for the tickets! (After two weeks. Sure.) So quit! Anyway, because this is babysitter world, it has a happy ending. Fun. When the Princess Diaries isn't doing it for you, and you need a literary spa.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Princess Diaries 6

Princess Diaries 6 by Meg Cabot
There are soo many of these books, that by this point I don't even say their names, just "PD 1/2/3/4/5/6". Now, I loved these books when I first read them, because it was the first time there was a vegetarian heroine. But now...Well, I still love Ms. Cabots' books, but they're not at te top of my list. Personally, I use them as literary spas, to relax. I love literary spas!
In the latest installments of Mia's adventures, she's started the 10th grade, and is mourning the loss of seeing her boyfriend, Michael everyday. God, I WISH she'd stop going on about Michael, he's getting slightly boring by this point. Anyway, it turns out that is the least of her problems, as she's dumped a load of snails in the ocean, she's freaking out about what her boyfriend may or may not want to do, coping with Lily's and Grandmere's weird plan, and trying to fend off Lana, evil cheerleader. What's a princess to do?
This is slightly lacking on the plot front, as the past 3 books have featured Mia freaking out about her boyfriend, which gets kind of boring after a while. However, this book is quite entertaining, if you're looking to spend an afternoon relaxing when there's only reality TV on.
***

Hi!

You may know me from vegetarianfashionista.blogspot.com, moneymiss.blogspot.com and thecurlysideoflife.blogspot.com And now it's book-worm-girl.blogspot.com! I'll have what I'm reading, with reviews. Have fun reading!!!